Sunday, January 18, 2015

The Blues

  After my brother passed away, the whole family except for yours truly got the flu.  Take a moment to digest that.  The whole family got the flu. They all started to look like this on Monday afternoon:

   In the scheme of things that might not seem like a big deal, except when you consider the fact that I'm the midst of cooking, cleaning, serving, and caring there is little time left over for grieving.  Add to that the fact that all I wanted all week was for someone to hug me while I cried a river, and I couldn't get a hug from anyone unless I, too, wanted to succumb to this horrible plague.  It's making me a pretty sad elf.  

                 Rose is a sad elf too.

   It's lasted for a week, so far.  So instead of lying in Coffeeguy's arms for comfort, he's on the couch with all his germs and I'm this sea of alone-ness that is my bed.  I can't even call Mom, because she has it worse than any of us, and she's grieving the loss of a son for the second time.  My feeling of alone-ness is only trumped by my feeling of helplessness--there is absolutely nothing I can do to help my mother that my remaining brother isn't already doing..I wanted to end this with the moral to the story, but somehow I'm missing it.  


  1. I'm sorry for your loss and hope this flu ride ends soon for your family. I'd probably say the flu is slowing you guys down so you can grieve just a bit at home even if feeling miserable due to illness but at least not in the mist of hustle and bustle of daily life. None the less, I hope you get those extra hugs real soon xo,

    1. Thanks, Mari! I think the tough part for me is I don't have the flu, so I'm trying my best to take care of everyone else. I either feel frustrated there's no time to grieve or helpless because there's nothing more I can do for them than give them liquids and medicine! It will pass. Thank you for the kind words :)