But over the last few months I've come to realize how much I'm thriving. I'm able to write more than I had in years. I'm working on a novel. I've been published on The Good Men Project, The Huffington Post, and BlogHer. I've been involved in writing communities, and I've gotten the hang of being at home with the kids and not needing to do something every minute. Punkgirl remarked the other day--"You slay at this. At being a mom at home." I've shown my kids the workaholic mom--how could they not see it? They were in the same school where I worked, and felt it keenly every time I chose to finish my work instead of seeing what they were doing.
This isn't a working mom criticism--it's a working me criticism. I give my all to any job--and that includes the one at home. So in doing so, for me, it later came to hurt me. Because just one comment from Punkgirl--"remember when you went out of the house to work, and you never had time to read our stuff or give us challenges or play games with us?"
That cut me to the quick. She has begged me not to go back to work, and despite a desire to see other adults and have conversations that don't revolve around diapers or drama, I haven't. And I failed at that at first...but now, I feel like I'm finally coming into my own. Like I'm owning the s-a-h-m role. Like I'm slaying it.
So without further ado...over the next few months I will be changing my site from Suck At Home Mom's Cranky Blog...To Slay At Home Mom's Nerdy Blog. I'm going to try to take the two things I love to do--activities with the kids, and all things nerdy--into one blog. Wish me luck, and I hope you'll love the new blog as much as the old! (Feedback is always appreciated!)